Respect Yourself, Respect Your Word

If you do not honour your words, no one else would.

Honour your words means treating what you say with respect and putting in sincere effort to achieve what you say. Being a leader would force you to think ahead and create a future. You may create a future that looks difficult. You may make promises that you don't know how to keep. And you may fail. However failure doesn't matter, as long as your intentions were honest and your efforts were sincere.

If you do not honour your words, no one else would. This is probably the most important criteria of being a leader.

Leaders Create More Leaders

Successful leaders create more leaders, not followers.

Leadership is a way of being that generates passion in others for your cause or project. The bigger the cause or project, the higher the number of people you need to influence. For really big causes or projects, you need to be able to create leaders who would further influence others. The number of people you can influence has no limit, if you can create leaders who could further create more leaders such that they can further create even more leaders, and so on....

If you want to be a leader for a large cause or project, stop trying to find followers and start creating more leaders.

Design the future You Live into

At each moment in life, there is a PAST (that was) and there is a FUTURE (that can be). You are free to choose your being in PRESENT based on the past (that was), or the future (that can be).

Your being in Present based on the Past (that was), will ensure that your Future would be a continuation of the Past.

Your being in Present based on the Future (that can be), will ensure that your Future would be as designed by you, unconstrained by the Past.

Make your Dream-Map, And Believe in it

Normally our dreams are lost in the thousands of thoughts that pass through our mind everyday. Creating a Dream-Map, makes your goals clear to your mind and your belief in the same puts your being in action for achieving it.

Your Dream-Map is your list of top 5 dreams (or less, or more) that you want to achieve over the next few months or years. You do not have to put in too many details; however do try to be as specific as possible. Put up your Dream-Map at a place where you can see it from time to time. It is natural for some items on the list to change with time. However, it would be a challenge to achieve anything if you find yourself changing your Dream-Map frequently.

The Dream-Map would provide focus to your mind. As long as you regularly review the Dream-Map, this would happen without any conscious efforts. Similarly, if you strongly believe in your dreams, then your each decision and each move would be favorable to achieving your dreams. This is because decisions are always based on gut feel, which, in turn, is strongly influenced by what you believe.

Knowledge, Wisdom and Skills

Knowledge helps you understand. Wisdom helps you decide. Skills help you execute.

Knowledge is your ability to analyze and understand all aspects of any situation. It helps you identify the possible alternatives with their associated risks and benefits. Knowledge is your repository of information and learning. Knowledge comes from conscious mind and is based on logic. Knowledge is limited to your memory. What is forgotten is not known.

Wisdom is your ability to choose an alternative from possible alternatives. Wisdom comes from subconscious learning and is built based on all your experiences since birth and your natural instincts that came with birth. Wisdom is not based on logic, and is not limited by memory. It is not isolated by events or happenings. It comes from a consolidated subconscious experience of life and the natural instincts for survival.

Skill is your ability to execute and it comes from practice. Once your knowledge has identified the possible alternatives, and your wisdom has chosen one of the alternatives. Your skills help you move forward on the alternative.

Decisions Are always Based on Gut Feel

Decisions can never be made logically. Logic can, at best, help you identify the obvious choice.

When any alternative in decision making seems logically better than the others, the choice is obvious. E.g. the alternative ways of going up to the 15th floor of a building is to take the elevator or the stairs. Taking the elevator definitely seems to have more logic, hence the choice is obvious and no decision is required.


Real decision making is required when the alternatives are logically similar. Consider that you are getting late for your flight, and there are two routes that you can take to the airport. Route A is much longer but is likely to have less traffic, whereas Route B is shorter but is likely to have much more traffic. Both routes have their positives and negatives. Whichever route you choose, there is a risk of missing the flight, either due to distance, or due to traffic. It is not possible to make a logical decision on the routes as both routes seem equally risky.


Clearly, decision making is required only when all alternatives have logically equal risk and/or benefit. Hence you always have to rely on your Gut Feel to make the decisions.

Respect Your Decision

Respect for your own decisions is the foundation of your confidence.

Your decision is the choice you make when faced with alternatives that have logically similar risks and benefits. Decisions are always based on gut feel. When you make a decision you choose an alternative together with its benefits as well as risks.

However, once the decision is made, many of you start getting uncomfortable with the risks associated with your own choice. You also start regretting the benefits (of other alternatives) that you gave up as a result of your decision. This is normal and expected since the alternatives were logically similar in risks and benefits. This leads to post decision dissonance and the associated discomfort and lack of confidence.

You need to respect your decision once you have chosen the alternative and avoid thinking about the other alternatives. Don't forget that the other alternatives had their own risks, as evaluted by you before taking the decision.

Have faith in your gut feel and respect your own decisions. Don't look back once the decision is made. This simple practice will dramatically improve your confidence and effectiveness.

Be Confident- Support Your Gut Feel

Confidence is the faith and respect that you have for your gut feel.

You make hundreds of conscious or subconscious choices every day. Many of these choices result from decisions. As discussed in an earlier post, a decision is choosing an alternative from logically similar alternatives, based on your gut feel. Each alternative is equally good or bad, intelligent or stupid, safe or risky.

You appear and feel confident when you support your gut feel and focus fully towards achieving the objective of your decisions. Your focus and commitment helps you achieve the objective, which in turn increase your faith in your gut feel, and hence increases your confidence. This is a positive confidence building cycle.

When you do not support your gut feel. You start doubting your decisions from the very beginning and attempt your objectives with fear, apprehension and concern. Your lack of support for your decisions often leads to failure which further reduces your faith in your gut feel, and hence decreases the confidence. This is a negative confidence destroying cycle.

To increase your confidence, start supporting your gut feel. Your gut feel cannot be wrong because the outcome of your decision depends more on the support and respect that you have for your decision, and less on the decision itself.

Come Out Of Your Comfort Zone

For any significant achievements in life, you need to come out of your comfort zone and embrace change.

Our comfort zone is the environment that we are familiar with. Irrespective of how good or bad it is, we have a natural tendency to stick to our familiar environment, and resist change. Familiarity makes the environment seem predictable. In a predictable environment you can prepare for the worst and feel in control. A change in environment makes us feel helpless, as we do not know what to expect.

This discomfort is a natural feeling and it cannot be wished away. So whenever you plan to achieve something you need to consciously accept being uncomfortable during the initial phases. Instead of struggling with your discomfort you need to focus your energies on your achievements and in getting comfortable in the new environment.

Acknowledge Your Present

Very often we are so focussed on future that we lose sight of gifts in our present.


It is important to design our future and move towards it. However, this should not be at the cost of being ignorant of our present. It is more important to be aware of our present and be conscious of the gifts that we already have. Failure to acknowledge your present would mean a life full of frustrations, simply because you step into your future only when it becomes present.

Living Multiple lives in one Life Time

For you to be at peace with yourself, you need to be at peace in each of the multiple lives that you are living.


We live multiple lives in our lifetime. Whereas at a subconscious level we are aware of it, we seldom look at it from this perspective. We broadly categorize our activities and environment as personal or professional based on whether it is home, friends, work or non-work related.

I want you to consider for a moment that the differentiation in your personal and professional life is not only external but is internal as well; i.e., you are a very different person in each life. In fact, if you isolate your personal and professional life and look at yourself from a third person's perspective you will see two very different individuals.

Awareness changes your view of Life.Practice helps you live by the new view.

Awareness and practice are the keys. The purpose of sharing my insights is to increase awareness of some new perspectives to life. Once you are aware of something, it changes the rest of your life, whether or not you do anything about it. And if you do decide to practice it, the change is more dramatic and faster.